Saturday, September 21, 2013

Cohen Diet

I just heard about this thing called three Cohen Diet and I was quite surprised to find that it seems to be pretty popular here in the Philippines. Lots of local bloggers seem to be on it.

Anyhow, it seems to be really hard to get info on the diet. What I've gleaned from my Google Fu so far:

@ It's a personalized diet based on a blood test to figure out your hormonal imbalances

@ You'll need to consume 900 to 1,600 calories a day

@ it costs $249 to get into the program for 12 weeks

I'm a little peeved at this diet because I can't figure out what is principles are. All I know is your supposed to eat foods to fix your HGH, Serotonin and Insulin levels, but without more information on what foods you eat I'm just not impressed.

Further, I'm a bit skeptical: the calorie maximum per day it's ridiculously suspicious. The fact is, pretty much anyone who is overweight it's going to lose weight off they limit their intake to 1,600 calories a day.

Just on that alone, it's rather recommend people just do a 1,600 calorie diet a day and see if you don't lose weight like crazy.

You may save $250 in the process.

posted from Bloggeroid

Thursday, May 16, 2013

my Grados? They're wireless!!!

Haha, joke post! There's nothing wrong with my Grados! In fact, they've never been better!

People who've known me a long time know that I'm a headphone geek. I wouldn't really say Audiophile, more like, I am picky about headphones (as I am picky about everything, it seems).


People also know that my Grados have been heavily modified. It has wooded cups, vinyl velor pads that go around my ears, real leather headband, a single-sided detachable cable, and it has more bass than you can shake a stick at. (So sue me, I'm a bass head, no forward mids for my Grado!).

Well today I finally got myself a little bluetooth adapter, which you can see there on the left cup. It's attached to the slider of the headphone (which allows you to adjust the size of the headphone to your head) and then connected to the headphone's input jack (which I had modded in) by a short male-to-male cable.

The result: my Grado now connects to an iPod Nano 7G via bluetooth. Look ma, no wires! If I pair it with my phone, I can use it to take calls. And man does it feel snazzy to walk around the mall with my retro wooden Grados without any cables in the way!

Ahhh, this is bliss. There's nothing wrong here guys, sorry I just trolled my own blog. Haha!

the Philippines? Stupidest Country in the World

Oh yeah! Time has named us the most stupid country in the world!



Or maybe not. How could Time possibly release this cover two days ago,  the month isn't over, Time isn't releasing its May issue until May 20, 2013. Whoops!

You know why we're stupid? Because we fall for trollblog crap like this without batting an eyelash. I get a laugh seeing how many bloggers blogged about this, as if it were true! April Fools day should be changed to mid-May so that people don't feel so bad about this.

Seriously though, I am inclined to agree with this sentiment. Everytime the elections roll over, I can't help but think that we really are the stupidest country in the world. Grace Po? Nancy Binay? Oh my god.  It's true, people. All you need to do to win the elections in the Philippines is to be an actor. Ugh.

Damn only tax payers should be allowed to vote!

Stupid Gaming Grade Mice?

Tell me, have you heard this before?

"Razer Mamba... it's got a 5700dpi sensor... unbelievable accuracy.... best mouse ever..."
"Logitech G9.... the Ferrari of mice...."
"RAT9... the most comfortable mouse I've ever used..."

Yada yada yada.

Let me tell you my friends.  I am a hardcore PC gamer. I have owned more gaming mice than most people have children. No wait, that's not a very big boast. But what the hell. Point is, I've been around the block. I've tried gaming mice from a lot of the "super brands" of the mouse world. Yeah, that includes Logitech, Razer, Cyborg and Steel Series.  I am used to paying $100 for a gaming mouse. Why? Because I want a really nice mouse to use when killing schmucks.  Because I'm a connoisseur. Because little things annoy me. Because I like wireless mice and hate cables. Because I hate lag. Because I... I could go on and on. But I better not waste your time any further.

Let's just say: I am serious. Like the internet. Yeah. Serious business. So over the years I have gone through a ton of models. I buy a new gaming mouse every year. But you know what? It suddenly hit me. Why the hell am I buying a new mouse every year? There was a time when I only bought a new mouse every 3-4 years.  That was when I was back in high school and not really earning much (actually, I earned squat, I just had an allowance).

Lately, though, I've been buying a new mouse every year. Why is that? Because the goddamn freakin' mice keep BREAKING DOWN.  And I ask myself... why the hell is my $100 Razer or my $100 Logitech breaking down after just a year of use, when I used to have el-cheapo mice from A4Tech that... guess what... still work perfectly fine today!  And A4 Tech is a name synonymous with "cheap" -- The "A4" in A4 Tech actually stands for "Affordable."

So why is it that this mouse has served me well for the past 7 years?





That sirs is a true classic, the A4 Tech X7 Gaming Mouse. It's a simple mouse. It's an optical, corded mouse  with 4 DPI settings - from 400 to 1000. It has a red button near the LMB that is a "Turbo Button" -- it returns two clicks on each press. Great for shooters. Two thumb buttons and a scroll wheel round off the package. The cord was nice and thin, very flexible, hardly gets in your way when playing... this is the only mouse cord that didn't bother me when playing FPS games because it was so slight. So slight, indeed, that as you can see the plastic has frayed off the cord and exposed the wires underneath. Surprisingly, it still works perfectly today, around 7 years after I first bought it. Every single part of this mouse is still in perfect working shape, even though it looks like trash.

Now, compare that with this sorry lot:


You'll notice here a trio of $100 mice. Why, that one on the left most... the famed Logitech G7.... is actually worth $250 nowadays! Go check it on Amazon. But I digress.  Here's a sorry set of mice. I actually had two G7's. One was the original green one... which by the way was much better than this newer blue black one. But what really pisses me off about these three mice is that all of them gave up the ghost around a year after I got them. Actually, not even. The G7 lasted me about two years to be honest. Each of them in turn (I had two remember?)

But the RAT9 pictured above only lasted me about 6 months, and the Naga Epic on the rightmost also about two months before problems started. Actually, no, problems started almost from day one with these two mice, but the really annoying problems started about a 6 months in.

The Logitech G7 -- ahh, I'll be honest. This was a GREAT mouse. The shape was perfect. It was soooo comfortable. The weight was perfect, not too light, not too heavy. It slid on any mouse pad, and tracked really, really well. The problem? The damn left mouse button. Logitech, for all their expensiveness, tends to break down in one of two ways. The real problem with these mice though is that the left mouse button tends to break and do its "double click trick" after a year or so. To be fair with the G7, these mice usually start having issues around a year or so in. The double click was an issue, and I had to open the mice to fix them.... there's a way to do so by bending the copper click thing inside. You can google it or find it on YouTube if you need to know how. It's a pain in the ass to do, took me about 2 hours, but I loved the G7 so much that I persevered.

But these  mice tend to break down anyway later one thanks to its radio-frequency tech. Since its' a 2.4Ghz wireless, apparently with wireless mice the receivers fry themselves out every now and then. Too bad for me, because I can't live with corded mice anymore. That's why I moved to the G7 from the X7 in the first place. Long story short, even after fixing the LMB, the wireless tracking just breaks down after a while, and I know of no way to fix it. It's sad that the wireless tracking breaks down even before the batteries die out! But such is the life of a tailless rodent.

That said, I would have to say that the Logitech G7 is the single best mouse I have ever owned. It is great in so many ways, but namely the hot-swapping of the batteries that never left you out to dry, the super comfy ergonomics (batteries would die out and I still felt no strain on my hand), the light feel, awesome tracking and the tilty click wheel (which gave you an extra two buttons) were just awesome. The only real problem with this mouse was that they reduced the thumb buttons to just a single one! Why Logie, why? It baffles me how stupid Logitech can be. Less is more sometimes, but this is NOT one of those times! Why not just give us a cordless MX500 Logie? That was the perfect mouse, if it only didn't have a tail. The G7 was supposed to be a cordless MX510, except you took out one of the buttons. It. Just. Baffles. Me.

For 4,000php a pop, it was not bad. Over two years, I spent 8,000 on my gaming mice,a nd although they broke after a while, I was not mad with them, just sad to see them go, and sad to learn that Logitech had discontinued these mice. (That's why they're so expensive on Amazon... some hacks are trying to cash off of the only remaining G7s left in the world! Endangered species, let's put it on the IUCN list)

Then we have the RAT9, which I got next. Oh. Where to begin. This clusterfuck of a mouse looked sooo cool that I had to have one. I bought one at Data Blitz for about 7,000 bucks or so (that's around US $160). It had that super cool function that no other mouse at the time (including the G7) had... a Sniper Button! This nifty button is what made me grab this mouse up in the first place. If you press it, your DPI settings drop down as long as it's pressed... which let you snipe with the needed fine tuning, while you still had your regular DPI for your CQB combat. It was an awesome idea! On paper.

In practice though, the issue with the RAT9 is how fucking unergonomic it was. This was the most frustrating thing about this mouse. The RAT7 and RAT9 were billed as the most comfortable gaming mice in the world... and if it didn't work for you, you could adjust it! Now, I have the Saitek Cyborg Stick. It's a flight stick that has adjustable grips, button placement, etc. It was really nifty. Now Saitek applied this concept to a mouse, and had MadCatz sell the product. As I had had a previous good experience with the Cyborg Stick, I felt that the RAT9's exorbitant price tag was worth it.

But sadly, no matter how much I adjust his damn mouse, I can't make it comfortable! So let that be a warning all of you... it's not a mouse that works for everyone! I would say it works best for people with small hands, because it's a tiny mouse. There weren't enough options to change the shape... even at the longest extension with the biggest palm rest, it was not comfortable. And by the way, the customization options on this mouse are a joke. You only can change the palm rest with three options (two shapes, one is plastic the other matte) and they don't really help. In fact, choosing the larger palm rest just makes for a weird, bumpy shape that will NEVER be comfy. You can also change where this part rests along the length of the mouse to make it "longer," but this makes it even worse as now there is a big hole in the middle of the mouse that is so not comfy.  You can also change the pinky grip... frankly, I took it out altogether so I could grip the mouse better, it was too big and unwieldy and heavy with any grip on, especially the "wing grip" -- and change the angle of the thump rest. And that's it! Oh wow, did the marketing hoopla every get me!  This mouse is barely customizable, and woe to you if its basic shape doesn't work for you, because there's not much to adjust!

Because of this, and how heavy the damn thing is (I took out all the weights, but it was still too heavy as the base of the mouse is solid steel or something) and how small it is, it's hard to actually press the sniper button and maintain a good grip to snipe with in the heat of battle. As a result, I never used it. Whenever I tried, I had to adjust the way I gripped the mouse, so I couldn't aim naturally as I was used to, and I failed to hit anything with the supposed fine tuning I got. Such a shame.

Basically, this mouse was uncomfortable to use from the get go, never grew on me, and gave me right hand cramps. The G7 never did. Worse, the mouse sucks at tracking! It's got like 5,800dpi tracking or some such, but frankly the mouse was skippy and never really gave me the kind of fine tracking I needed. For a $160 mouse I was sure as hell expecting a lot more, considering that my cheap A4 Tech X7 only cost $10 and tracked much, much better, even with its measly 1000dpi.

It was such that, after six months when the mouse started having problems finding the receiver... it would have "skip lag" for like 5 seconds at a time before it would start working, and this happened intermittently to the point that it was unusable... I was actually relieved that I now had an excuse to buy a new mouse.

Freaking 6 months.... god dammit. Where is the quality control?

Enter the Razer Naga Epic. Well, this was a pretty decent mouse. Shape was much, much better than the RAT9 for ergonomics. Looks nice, too. I opted for this one over the Mamba because I wanted the extra buttons. Took some getting used to, but it worked for me. This is another one of those 5600dpi mice. In practice, it doesn't really track as well as the G7 or the X7. Huh. I got this mouse for 6,000php, around $140US, and wow, I was really expecting a hell of a lot more, especially since it's by Razer, which if you would believe the poor fucks writing reviews on the internet, is Mouse Maker Royalty.

Sorry, the emperor ain't wearing nothing and I'm here to tell all of you people: STOP FREAKING THINKING THAT MORE EXPENSIVE MICE ARE BETTER, THEY'RE NOT!!!!

The Razer tracks poorly, it felt "slow" and that's all I can say, even though it has a much higher theoretical DPI than the G7. DPI doesn't really mean anything, anyway. I never game with more than 3200 DPI or so on my mice which could go over 5000. Higher DPI is really only important when your monitor's resolution is so high that you need more DPI to cover it. The X7, for instance, has 1000dpi and I find it now moves the cursor a little too little for the amount of physical space I move the mouse. Other than that, higher DPI means NOTHING.   I currently have a 1920x1080 monitor, and at this res the X7's 1000DPI doesn't cut it. About 2000dpi is just right for me at this resolution, though of course your mileage will vary. But back when I still had a 720p TV, the X7's DPI was perfect for me.

The Razer, now, it worked okay. Not the best, most responsive mouse I tried, and yes I used it in wired mode too... a lot actually, since the battery keeps dying on me mid-session, and no, there was no difference in the feel of the mouse other than the cord getting in the way because it was so fat. So, why isn't it as nice to use as the G7 or X7? Hell I know. But I think it's because Razer uses cheap components, doesn't know how to engineer properly, and just plain suck.

Cheap components you say? Hell yeah! The Razer's RMB is now double-clicking! Oh wow. I am used to the LMB getting the double click problem from all the Logitech mice I had, but this is the first time that a mouse's RMB wore down before the LMB! Amazing that Razer was the first one to let me down in such a novel way! Hats off to you Razer, it takes talent to fuck up the wrong way so differently from how everyone else fucks up.

But at least, Razer's receiver tracking still works after six months. RAT9 died by then.


Anyway, yes, I know these mice have warranty, but come on! For >$100US I expect that I shouldn't have to use the warranty for at least a year, preferably not for 3 years! None of these super expensive, "Mercedes Benz of PC Peripherals" companies lasted that long!  Not Cyborg, not Razer, not Logitech. And this is a repeating trend. I've had corded optical Logies as well, and they all broke down after a while in one way or another... usually the LMB with Logie.

I have had so much ire for Logie that I even kept myself from buying a Logitech G700 (the successor of the G7) because I was wary of the brand after letting me down so many times. I will probably eventually get one though when the Razer Naga Epic becomes totally unusable. Fortunatley, double clicking on the RMB is not as huge a PITA as double left clicking, but it still sucks when you are working in Excel for instance.

Well I'll get a G700 one of these days, yeah I'm a sucker for punishment, but in the meantime, I was using the X7 to play some games where double RMB is a no no, like the unbelievably great Dungeons of Dredmor. (Double right clicking often ended up with you double casting a spell, double-shooting an arrow, or double-drinking or eating a potion or consummable -- not healthy in a genre where one wrong move kills you and your entire character is wiped).

But as I mentioned, the X7's low DPI was giving me fits on my 1080p monitor so I went out and got this to tide me over until I felt like splurging another $100 on a gaming mouse:



Say hello to another el-cheapo brand, the Elephant!


As you can see on its right mouse button, this is an Elephant. The model is "Masada" which is the only model in the Elephant line up that is wireless. Let's see if it lasts me 6 months or a year. We shall see. But even if it doesn't, I'm not particularly distraught. I only bought this mouse for about 700 bucks! That's like $16US. For $6 than the X7, I get a mouse that's just like the X7, except wireless.

And here's the great thing about this mouse:  it's light! As light as the X7, even with two AAA batteries inside to power it. It has no hot-charging options like the G7, Naga Epic or RAT9, but I have a normal battery charger and lots of AAA's so no sweat. I don't know how long one charge will last, but as this isn't a "gaming grade" mouse that polls 1000 times per second, the battery will probably last me 2-4 weeks. I'll get back to you guys on that.

But you know what? That 1000 times per second polling rate that Razer is so proud of is USELESS and in fact, through testing and fiddling with the Razer synapse software, I found a poll rate of 125 times per second actually felt better and less finicky than 1000. Go figure. Anyway, the Masada has a DPI switch to change it from 1000dpi to 2000dpi -- and at 2000dpi it hits the sweet spot for me.

It's also so light, so comfy and has a rubber left thumb grip, much like the Roccat Pyra, which is another gaming grade mouse was somewhat okay, but mostly a pain in the ass because its wireless receiver kept timing out. After a year, its charging circuit apparently gave up because it can no longer charge the batteries I put in, so I just use it as a wired mouse. Which sucks actually because the wire doesn't actually make it wired, it just gives it power, you still need to pop in the finicky USB receiver to use it, so you take up two USB slots instead of one.... but enough of that.

This Elephant is great, it has a nice silent click wheel, a great grip, it's made of plastic and not that icky rubbery matte finish that Razer just loves -- and which sloughs off your mouse after a few months leaving an icky mess that is impossible to clean up, and sticky and yucky to touch -- so yeah, I'm happy this cheap mouse doesn't have that "feature."

The only drawback to the Elephant mouse is that it has no charging features for its batteries, but I'll see if the battery life is good enough that it won't be a major headache. The mouse also feels very cheap, and while it looks great from the top, if you look at it from the underside it's got "cheap plastic" written all over it. Still, that's no biggie, as long as I am not holding the mouse up all the time, it looks great from the top and it performs like a champ.    I wish this mouse had more buttons, but it's just a very basic five button mouse with DPI switch. For $16, though, I am not complaining.  We'll see if it stays working after a six months, and if it does, shame on Razer and Logie for having mice that cost 10 times as much and yet not being able to stay for the long haul.

It's ridiculous. The Roccat Pyra, a wireless gaming mouse, its wireless tracking still works without any hiccups. It handles better than the Naga Epic and RAT9, by the way, only issue is the USB receiver is finicky, and I had to put two stumps of paper in the USB so that the connections would touch the PC's USB and prevent it from shorting out. Its internal charging circuit gave after 3 years -- I can forgve it for lasting 3 years without anything else breaking -- mouse buttons are fine and don't double click after all this time, and it still tracks like a champ as long as the USB receiver is fit in perfectly. It didn't have all the best options, but at least it's still working properly, which is a lot more than I can say for the Naga Epic, the RAT9, or the two Logies.

So yes, my friends, that is what's wrong with these gaming mice. The big companies like Logie and Razer are just milking you of your dollar on the brand and marketing that has somehow fooled all the gullible twits writing reviews out there. Wish you schmucks would write your review after 6 months or so and see if your beloved "best mouse evar!" is still working properly.  Logie and Razer are using cheap mice components, and the proof is in the buttons that stop working way before the supposed "rated for 8 million clicks!" I see on the box.  The wireless receivers fry themselves out after just a few months to a year or two, and the annoying matte finishes keep falling off like goo (that's why the original plastic shiny G7 is better than the dark, gooey matte G7). Let's not even get into the piece of crap software drivers Logie and Razer pack with their mice. The latest version of Synapse was so bad, I had to go back to an earlier version that I hunted down from the net.

At least the el-cheapo mice I'm using stay with me for the long haul, which is a lot more than I can say for these crappy emperors with new clothes.

May you choose the right gaming mice for you, and not the ones you buy just from the marketing hoopla!

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Found Footage Movies?

Ever since the Blair Witch grossed $250 milllion in 1999 from a measly budget of $20,000, this decadent style of filmmaking called “Found Footage” has seen its star rise and overpower the millions of hapless movie goers who apparently can’t think for shit.

What’s even funnier are the producers who see the ridiculous Return on Investment of this kind of project, and go ahead and think they can strike it big and make millions just by spending thousands. It’s a kind of defeatist mentality, to want to spend dirt bottom to produce gold, meaning that your production will suck, with trash actors, no music score, and special effects a highschooler could produce in his backyard. But apparently, people actually think they can do it again, and that’s why we keep getting junk like Paranormal Activity, Chronicle and even Cloverfield. Laughably, Cloverfield was a big budget film... and only grossed $170M which is less than the original Blair Witch!  

What some supposedly smart producers fail to realize is that the reason Blair Witch did so well, was because it insidiously duped people into believing it was real, and it was that word of mouth that got people to watch it. There are actually dumbasses out there who thought it was real footage! The marketing campaign that led to Blair Witch’s success was nothing short of flat out lying, but hey you do what you can to make a buck. That’s why no other found footage film has succeeded at grossing as much as Blair Witch did, not even juggernaut of found footage films, Cloverfield, which had a budget of $25M.

But so the Found Footage dyansty begins. That kind of trick won’t work again, though, people have seen it once and unless you have a population of stupid sheep (oh wait...), it won’t work again. Thankfully, we seem to be a much more intelligent legion of sheep as truthfully, it hasn’t been replicated again, although the damage has been done and movies like this still keep cropping up.

Why do I hate this format of film so much? Because it’s pretentious, illogical, and downright defeatist. It’s pretentious because it tries to pass itself off as “artsy” or what not... and I bang my head on the pavement  each time I see such a movie because, apparently, it works! For some unfathomable reason, people actually think it’s “fresh” and “innovative” and interesting... when all I see is a poorly shot shaky piece of crap footage with no internal consistency.

What do I mean by a lack of internal consistency? It’s illogical: these films all work on the premise that there is some omni-present camera man actually taking all the footage. This works in many situations, but only the ones where it makes sense to have someone actually filming. There are scenes where a monster is running after you, and you are seriously still pointing the camera at it?! Cloverfield was guilty of this. Or how about scenes in Paranormal Activity where your goddamn wife is having an emotional breakdown and crying her eyes out, and all you’re doing is film her with a stupid look on your face (I just assume the stupid look – because you’d have to be thick as a rock to not put the camera down and hug your wife and comfort her). Some of these movies try to get creative to get around this limitation like Chronicle did, which came up with the excuse that the guy was a camera freak and with his new found telekenetic powers, kept his camera on the entire time filming automatically with his telekenisis!

Seriously, if you’re going to go through all that trouble why not just film it the normal way!? But film makers won’t do that, because they want to be “different” and “fresh” and “innovative” in the way that the stupid mecahnic of found footage works.  Frankly, Chronicle went overboard with its wannabe creativity by even introducing reporter footage from a helicopter and CCTV footage from nearby public cameras, jumping even further into the realm of illogical internal inconsistency in the name of pretentious creativity, but hey what do I know, they’re the film makers and the public is actually enjoying their movies, right? I mean they’re still making money off the movie-going sheep (Chronicle grossed about $120M) so if the public wants trash, they can just keep giving them trash.

Anyway, enough of that. I bring this up today because I just watched one of the cult films of 2010, a little-known film called Troll Hunter. I was hearing tons of positive reviews about this film, and trolls sounded interesting, so I went off and grabbed a copy off bit torrent.

Imagine my shock when I opened it to a disclaimer, “The footage in this film was delivered blah blah” uughghhhh oh my god another goddam Found Footage film. Well, I spent the better part of the last hour grabbing it so I might as well watch it.

Troll Hunter is inherently flawed because of its found footage format. It suffers more than most from internal inconsistency, which is such a shame because the subject matter and mythology was actually pretty interesting.

The main problem with Troll Hunter stems from its premise. Trolls are a national secret, and the government hires people to keep it that way. This is the reason why nobody knows about trolls to this very day. The Troll Hunter, the titular character of the movie, is a lone wolf hired by the government to kill trolls who go out of their territory, so as to keep all of this under wraps.  Here begins the central issue with this movie: so if they’re trying to keep it secret, why is Mr. Troll Hunter letting a gang of college students film him?!  Ostensibly it’s because he’s dissatisfied with his low-paying, high-danger job with no perks and benefits, not even night differential (must suck to be a Troll Hunter).

But if that were the case, why doesn’t he simply quit? If it’s that bad, there has to be better jobs out there that don’t risk life and limb, and yet here he goes doing the same old shit day in and day out. I mean, there’s a limit to stupidity, right?  But I guess that doesn’t matter to a genre as internally inconsistent as all found footage movies are.  The stupidity doesn’t stop there. Okay, so let’s say as viewers we can suspend our disbelief and we buy that the Troll Hunter really is that stupid.

But then,  in a twist of idiocy near the early part of the film, the college students get to film the Troll Hunter’s crew and his boss, who go about doing their government conspiracy cover up, which involves dragging a bear carcass onto the scene to take the fall for the troll, and even going so far as using a “bear paw kit” to fake the footprints of the bear.

Put that bear over there. Yeah! That'll fool 'em!

 
I once loved eating Bear Paws as my favorite desert. This kind of ruined it.

And the boss, who apparently wants to keep the secrecy (because he’s Evil Management and not sympathetic to the harddships of his plebian front liners who do all the hardwork), and yet he allows the hapless college students to film every single bit of their coverup! I mean, what kind of coverup lets people film it so that it can be revealed to the world at large?! And it’s not like he didn’t know about it... he even talks straight into the camera and says, “Stop filming. You cannot keep that footage!”

And then he gets into his car and drives away. ZOMG. That is the kind of stupidity you can only find in Found Footage movies.

Ignoring all this dumb shit, let’s talk about the rest of the movie. Which is an even bigger pile of dumb shit. Ignoring the interesting fauna in the film, due to the nature of found footage, we are subjected to even more illogical, internally inconsistent things especially in all the chase scenes found, which are typically the number one biggest offenders in found footage. There’s a part where the camera man gets caught in a cave by a rampaging hoard of trolls, and when he is caught, the camera drops and breaks. Later on it’s turned on again and kept on through the broken lens, and these are the most jarring parts of the movie from a logical, consistency perspective.

The entire movie falls apart when, after the aforementioned scene where the Troll Hunting Society Boss lets the college students go, he then later on comes back for them to get the footage. And he succeeds at the end of the movie... so why is the footage now available for the public to watch? Serious stupidity like this has me gnawing my teeth in frustration.

It’s a shame, the movie had some interesting ideas going on, like how Trolls die from direct exposure to sunlight as a result of an inability to metabolize Vitamin D from sunlight. We saw this in The Hobbit and this piece of folklore is used by the movie for a pseudo-science explanation. But then there are silly things as well, like how Trolls can smell Christians. The movie goes to great lengths to portray the trolls as natural animals that are part of the ecosystem, then all of a sudden introduces this strange ability to smell out your belief system! It makes you go, “What the hell?” and even though the film makers were just trying to incorporate more of the Scandinavian folklore on how trolls hate Christianity, it just doesn’t fly in the face of the picture the movie is trying to paint of what trolls are in nature.

The hapless crew of college students as well are an interesting bunch, with them starting out squeamish at using troll soap – a concoction of troll fat and lye distilled in a frying pan into concentrated essence, allowing you to camouflage your human scent and blend in the troll’s environment, unseen and unsmelt. Later on, as if this sort of things was usual, they enthusiastically apply the soap to keep life and limb safe, and you see just how their obsession with this documentary has changed their psyche and their minds.

It all falls apart though with the ending, which was a huge WTF ending that simply came up as if the film makers were saying, “Okay, we’ve showed off all the trolls we’ve made up, we’ve got nothing left in store, let’s just kill it off and end it there.” That kind of sloppy story-telling is just lousy, but hey I would expect nothing less from the Found Footage genre.

I still don’t understand the fixation the public has with the Found Footage genre, but I guess it makes sense. After all, we’re currently in a society that is in love with Reality Television, and I can’t stress how connected and similar the Found Footage genre is to Reality Television. They’re both cheap, low budget means to crank out blaise entertainment appealing to the lowest common denominator.  I’m sure our fixation with social media has something to do with it as well, but I’ll write about that another day. 

Friday, April 19, 2013

Overpriced Apple Cables?

Short cables for are awesome. Short cables for $25, is a joke.


I read in the news today this awesome little cable that I've wanted for a long time: A short 3" Lightning Cable.


http://www.macrumors.com/2013/04/18/nomad-lightning-cable-now-available-for-preorder-shipping-in-june/

It's perfect for small kits of gadget accessories that hold a charger or portable battery to charge your iPhone 5 or iPad Mini. Now that the old 30-pin dock connector is passe, it's time to move on to new technologies. The real problem is the price: It's a friggin' $25 for a three inch piece of cable!

More surprisingly, following the thread posted above at Mac Rumors, is that I see a ton of apologists actually defending the price point! Their arguments are laughable, like this one:

"Everyone, please don't tell me that the concept of portability is completely lost on you... 

Yes, it's $25. Yes, that's $25 for a very short cable. It's the same reason you pay several hundred dollars for a cell phone that isn't nearly as powerful as a laptop you could buy for about the same amount of money. Because it's portable. It's comfortable to have in your pocket whenever you need it. You're going to pay more for that convenience."



While it's true that for electronics, smaller and more portable often means more expensive. But that counts for complex electronic parts being crammed into a smaller shell. It doesn't apply here, where all you need to make it smaller is to cut the cable shorter. I mean, DUH.


Here's the real rub: Two years ago I bought a Griffin set of short cables off Amazon for about $15. I got three short cables, like the one you got here. The difference being the ones I got were 1 Mini USB, 1 Micro USB, and 1 30Pin Apple Connector.


http://www.amazon.com/Griffin-Technology-GC17097-USB-Mini-Cable/dp/B003T5KXJQ

These were awesome cables because they were so stall and fit into my minimalist kits. I could bring them anywhere, and coupled with a small battery I was never out of charging options for my gadgets (except the Samsung Galaxy Tab, which had its own proprietary connector, ugh).

I paid $15 for all three of them. So forgive me laughing at this very useful but insanely overpriced hunk of crap of $25.

But oh, it's a Lightning Connector! Those cables are the old Apple 30 Pin Adapter?

Oh please, the creativity of a 3-year old could resolve that issue. My solution? I bought a $5 Micro USB to Lightning connector. Then I attach it to my existing short Griffin Micro USB cable. Total cost? $20 for three cables and the adapter.

http://www.amazon.com/Lightning-Micro-female-Adapter-iPhone/dp/B009VH56FM

I'm doing something right because my solution is cheaper than the price of this overpriced hunk of crap, and I got three extra cable functions out of it to boot.


So really, who's the fool here? The dumb ass entrepreneurs who create dastardly overpriced gear to make a profit? Or the blind sheep consumers like us who keep buying this overpriced crap? Knowledge is power. If you know better, you can avoid scams like this. I'll keep posting more about what's wrong with this world, if I can help even a few people shape up their spending habits it'll all be worth it.



Friday, April 5, 2013

Reading Books on your Phone and Tablet?

Now, I've been an avid book reader for as long as I can remember. I still remember the old Jack and the Beanstalk and Time Life Children's books I read when I was 3 years old. The funky watercolor paintings that served as pictures in Jack and the Beanstalk never really looked good, I mean they looked like a child did them, but hey I was a kid at the time so it's 4Kids By Kids right?

Well anyhow, skip a decade or so later and here I am, all grown up, but still reading books! The only thing is, I don't read books on paper as much anymore. Why is that? Because I've been living it up with all the gadgets I got in the last decade! That includes an iPad, an iPhone, an iPad Mini and a Galaxy Note. Now, I got rid of the iPhone when I realized it was just way too small for my tastes. I mean, get a clue Apple, Samsung's just passed you in smartphone sales and their best models are have all 4" to 5" screens!

But I digress. I live a very busy lifestyle. So it's only natural that I digress. But what was the point? Oh yes, the point. Well I am out of the house a lot, and I typically leave my iPad at home. I use it at home because it's more comfy to use at home due to the larger size. But it's too big to have with you all the time, even the appropriately miniaturized iPad Mini.  But unlike these oversized iPads, the Note is with me all the time. It's my phone and subs for the iPad's functions whenever I'm not at home.

Now that's all well and good, but can we get to the point? Oh yes, well here's the thing: Apple's made bricks and buildings and flying rainbows about how its App Store ecosystem is way ahead of Google's Play Store. And in many ways, they are correct. While Google has made major leaps and bounds in the quality and depth of its Play Store, there are still a lot of apps that have no real counterpart on Android, or are just plain better, sometimes embarrassingly so, on iOS compared to Android.

One example is eReaders. Now, yes, we are getting to the point, right? Well here's the deal: in my estimate, the best eReaders in the world are iBooks and the Kindle Reader. Stanza used to be in the running, but it's been so horrible lately that I don't even bother with it anymore. iBooks has turned out to be a very, very good reader and has all the nice stuff going for it, it's fast, snappy, has nice animations/eye candy, you can underline and annotate, and all that stuff. The Kindle Reader is good, it's snappy and it has that whole Amazon ecosystem behind it, and most importantly, it has the one thing that iBooks doesn't have: proper syncing in between all your devices. Because the Kindle Reader is everywhere! Amazon's strong marketing and distribution clout we cannot fault.

But the Kindle Reader, aside from not having the bells and whistles the iBook reader has, has one major flaw: it only reads books from the Amazon Store! So what if, say, you have "acquired" books from elsewhere (like say a third party bookstore) or -- oh what the hell let's let it out of the hat, I got books from TUEBL and I'm god damn frikkin proud of it, so there -- and you want to read these books, but can't on Amazon's Kindle reader. So you read it on iBooks, right?

Well that's well and dandy, but like I said, I'm not home like 60% of the time! So I need to read it on the go with my Galaxy Note! "Well, my Padawan," you begin to tell me in a haughty, odious tone, "you have Aldiko and FBReader and all the wonderful readers on the Play Sto..."

STOP! STOP!

Yes. And one last STOP for good measure. I know. Yes. I've tried these readers out and they are ok. But like I said, some apps (actually, most apps) are just plain better on iOS, almost embarassingly so, and eReaders are no exception. All these Android readers are just downright embarassingly bad compared to their iOS brethren. Especially iBooks. So no. Just, no. And even if they were any good, that doesn't solve the lack of the key feature the Kindle Reader has: WhisperSync to seamlessly sync my bookmarks between my Note and my iPad.

So what's a joe to do?  Yes, that's what's wrong with reading on eReaders: there's no universal reader that syncs everything and does everything you would ask of it!

Or isn't there? Now I did some further digging and I found one reader that just might solve the problem. It's called Kobo.



Now the Kobo reader is pretty cool! It's like the Kitchen Sink of eReaders. It literally has everything. It's got that awesome page-turning eye candy that I first saw on Stanza. It's got a classy bookshelf that is customizable with different themes such as marble, wood or even lilac. It's got Facebook status updates and integration. It has bookmarks and syncing between devices. Heck, it even syncs annotations, reader comments and other profanities from other like-minded readers like yourself who have nothing better to do than to read books and bitch about them. And to nail the coffin they even included a reader stats tracker that tells you how fast (or how slow) you read a book! And all that jazz.

Really, it looks perfect right? And you can even import books from your dropbox account so adding new books is as easy as it gets, you don't even need a computer to do it.

So what's the catch?

Unfortunately, there's one big, big catch. The thing runs like a pig smeared in tar trying to pass through the eye of a needle. Ugh. It's that bad. When I was reading Ken Auletta's "Googled" on the damn thing (a book which I do own the paperback of, viola! Clean reading here, no pirates here, sir!) the page turning was okay but felt slow, sluggish, unaggressive. Worse, every ten pages or so a pink "Loading..." message would pop up on the upper right and keep me from actually, you know, doing some reading.



It's such a shame, the folks at Kobo had the right ideas, they had the best intentions, and they gave me perhaps the one single reader to rule them all. Sadly, they need to put it on a diet and make it run a few 100m dashes before anyone can even hope to comfortably use it.

I would like to give my hats off to Kobo, but darn What is Wrong With Them?! Test the damn reader and have some user acceptance first before you give it to us!

Alas, Feature Creep and Shoddy Programming seem to have won the day.